I took a long walk.
I’ve read so many times in books that long walks are not only beneficial for our health, they are also great chances to think and make important decisions. I believed them all to a certain extent, but I have never really tried going on a long walk.
I finally did.
It is the last day of April and the sky has cleared. There are clouds in the sky but they are the white, fluffy kind. If observed from a certain perspective, they look like cotton strings standing in a line waiting to go to heaven. The sun is shining bright and temperature is definitely going up. After a few weeks of deadlines-hell, I decide to bring my beloved camera out for a stroll.
I take the usual route, a mindless walk around the Binnenalster (small Alster), taking random shots here and there. At one point, I am able to find an unoccupied bench overlooking the lake, which I immediately claim possession. All I have with me are my camera and my phone, which is out of battery. There are all kinds of people sitting around me, but silence reigns. I like to think that nature’s beauty can filter out all unnecessary noises.
And before my mind can comprehend, my legs have stood up and kept going. So I follow the natural curve of the small lake which led to the Außenalster (big Alster). I think I’ve entered a state of flow. My legs keep a pace and my mind wanders. At one point, there are no more thoughts in my head. All I see is how the water looks like a diamond blanket covering up the never-ending horizon. All I see is how people walk together, smile together, inter-be with each other.
During that walk, time merely exists. Neither does space. I do not know what time it is or where I am. And I don’t care. I am flowing through space and time, to a infinity that is confined by my own will. Nothing matters, except for the fact that I am alive. What if time is just an invention and reality an illusion? Time is might as well the biggest lie ever. Why bother cutting a never ending entity into small chunks and claiming it for ourselves? Why do we need the feeling of belonging to someone or somewhere? We are here, but we are not here at all. None of the atoms that make up who we are is ours. We owe the universe everything that we have. Even our life depends on fate, which is just a collision of malfunctioning atoms.
From my point of view, our poverty is actually our power. We are infinity in its physical form. For when we die, our atoms restructure and live on forever. The only, truly possession that we poor people have, is our thoughts. It’s clear that thoughts are made by the neurones and synapses in our brains. But they are the result of a moment and that moment only. There are zillions combinations, yet somehow that unique combination happens to us. Who knows if it will ever happen again?
All photos taken with Canon AE-1 Program x Agfa Vista Color 400.